THE BEARS GET THEIR RESEARCH MASTERS DEGREE

 

'A particularly poignant session with The Bears cards and a very distressed little girl who was brave enough to share her feelings of sadness, anger and despair through these cards motivated me to reflect on how little we as practitioners challenge ourselves to face these often raw emotions.'

 

By Jenny Terry, social worker, researcher and reflector from Perth, Western Australia

 

I thought readers might be interested to hear about my experiences with using The Bears cards to assist me in making some sense of my struggles through six years of a Masters degree. I have used many of the materials from Innovative Resources primarily with child clients over a number of years-probably since the very first Strength Cards were produced-but I had never thought of using them for myself.

 

However, a particularly poignant session with The Bears cards and a very distressed little girl who was brave enough to share her feelings of sadness, anger and despair through these cards motivated me to reflect on how little we as practitioners challenge ourselves to face these often raw emotions.

 

I was going through a particularly difficult time in my research journey and the written journal I kept was full of my fears, hopes and insecurities. However, the words just didn't reflect fully the extent of my struggle. Pictures were needed. So one wet afternoon when the 'writer's block' was particularly strong I sat down with The Bears on the floor of my study and allowed them to 'talk to me'. What a powerful exercise that turned out to be.

 

I went back to the time when I started the research full of hope and optimism. Lo and behold, a hopeful, optimistic bear sprung from the floor. As the afternoon progressed puzzled, reflective, resistant and scared bears joined the queue to be included in my narrative. They told the story of the struggle for understanding of the 'foreign' language of research and the fears of the methodology. They pinpointed the time I came close to giving up and the tears welling from their eyes matched my well-remembered fears and sadness. The fierce anger of baby bears spoke volumes about the love-hate relationship I've had with decreasing deadlines and the threatening thesis that is never-ending.

 

The bowing, cheering and ecstatic bears shared my joy at accepted research proposals, abstracts for conferences and an exultant bear leapt out of the page to mark the applause at a presentation that was well received.

 

The Bears tracked my research journey with me as we travelled from quiet despair through apprehension to fury and frustration and then to contentment and satisfaction as the thesis took shape and clarity dawned. They reflected panic, concern and pleasure-in no particular order. The journey continues, now with the end in sight. From time to time more bears join the photocopied, but very much alive record. Over forty bears have shared my office with me, urging me on and reminding me of the roller-coaster progress of a research process. I may have forgotten the agony and even the ecstasy of this journey had it not been for my visual companions with their extremely expressive faces. That would have been a sad omission.

 

I would recommend that practitioners use The Bears, or the other resources, as personal reflections. It has given me an understanding and an appreciation of the courage of clients who, at our requests, share their fears and their joys with us through these brilliant and powerful cards. Thank you Innovative Resources for providing The Bears and all the other tools that allow such powerful conversations and reflections to occur.

 

Bears in The Family Tree

 

Heather Bryant works for The James Family as a social worker in Schools* in Rotorua, Aotearoa/New Zealand. She finds that using The Bears cards when meeting with children for the first time is a fun way to get to know their family (Whakapapa /family tree). Children identify who is important to them, as well as a little more about their relationships, when discussing the reason for choosing the particular bear card they chose for family members.

 

Children often like to take copies of their family tree home (a digital camera is handy for this). This often generates conversations with family members when reflecting on the pictures together.

 

In the situation pictured here, adding photos to The Bears cards allowed memories and story telling to occur for a child who does not see significant family members due to living overseas and strained relationships.

 

Another young client who Heather had met for the first time was struggling with reintegrating with her family after living most of her life with relatives. After creating her family tree she wanted to take it home. She returned to the next session saying that her family 'had changed already'. The family tree had been a non-threatening way of sharing her perceptions and feelings about relationships with family members.

 

*Social Workers in Schools is a joint early intervention initiative of The Departments of Child Youth and Family and Education.

 

Expressing Grief Beyond Words

 

Julie MacKenzie is a social worker with the State Coroner's Office (Victoria), working in the area of grief and loss. Recently Julie was involved in counselling a woman who, while visiting her family in Australia, had suffered a traumatic bereavement. While many of the extended family members were fluent speakers of English, the young woman was unable to speak English at all. A family member could act to a certain degree as translator, but was concerned about the needs of the young woman to sufficiently express her sense of grief and loss.

 

It was only at the beginning of the session that Julie realised it was going to be impossible to converse in English. She reached for the pack of Bear Cards that she always carries with her and spread them out on the table. Through the translator she invited the young woman to select some of the cards that expressed how she was feeling.

 

'Her first reaction was a huge smile as she connected with the bear characters,' said Julie. 'She sat and studied the cards and then selected three of them. With the help of the translator and using the bear images she was able to communicate how she was feeling.

 

'I think just being able to pick out the cards and show them to us was a big communication in and of itself. The Bears were another way to tap into feelings more accurately and break down the barriers of language. The extended family members were impressed that counselling could include such a creative form of communication beyond words.'

 

 

African Men Do Cry

Trauma Counselling for Couples in Uganda

By Barry Davis, Wesley Institute, Sydney

 

For the past two years a trauma training team from Wesley Institute in Sydney has travelled to Kampala, Uganda to provide trauma training for workers in the Great Lakes region of Africa. This region has been engulfed in a cycle of insurgency and conflict for more than 20 years.

 

During our first visit in July 2004, one of our team members, Paula Davis, was deeply troubled by the impact of trauma on couples’ relationships. In 2005, a three-day workshop was held in the capital, Kampala for 20 pastors and their wives, drawn from different denominations in Uganda. The facilitators, Barry Davis and Paula Davis, were invited to return in 2006 to conduct a further three-day training for six couples from the previous year. They also conducted a four-day conference with fourteen new couples.

 

African men do cry

The storytelling during the two trainings was compelling. Each participant wanted—needed—to stand before the group and share their story. One exercise invited them to draw a picture of their early family home or village and walk their spouse through the story. None stopped at their childhood; they drew the picture of their life up until marriage. Then every detail was conveyed as they looked at their art and verbalised the images.

 

They would plunge into places of deprivation and abuse—and laugh, but not in a mocking way. The other Africans also joined the laughter. The Muzungos (white people) were tearful and the Africans were laughing! Barry asked them why this was so.

 

‘We laugh to become one with our brother or sister and because it also touches areas in our lives that are painful. We laugh to move on.’ One young man covered a specific area of his picture and said, ‘I do not want this in my life and do not wish it to be part of my family.’

 

Some say African men don’t cry—they say their eyes are red, and in part that is what happens; small veins become red in the whites of their eyes. At one point during the training a member of our team shared a struggle they had experienced in a significant relationship. It was difficult stuff and all were listening intently. In response, one of the African men began to recount his struggle in this area. He told of polygamy, being ostracised and eventually dismissed. His voice never quavered as he rolled through this tragic litany. He came to the climax of his story by saying that at the division of property after his father’s death, there was nothing for him. Then he said, ‘And it hurts.’ His face fell into the palms of his hands.

 

African men do cry.

 

Resources

One of the most successful ways we have found to help couples shift their conversations is the use of the tools provided by St Luke’s Innovative Resources. Though I was unsure that they would work in Africa, I remember our first use of them. Paula decided we should use The Bears; colourful little cards with simple drawings of bears with varying expressions.

 

They were laid out on a table at the back of our meeting room ready to do their ‘stuff’. Participants were invited to circle the table and then, when everybody had had an opportunity to see all the cards, choose a bear that reflected their feelings. They were then invited to share with their spouse in a time of reflection and ‘couples enhancement’.

 

None of them had experienced this before. They circled the table pensively and then one made the mistake of selecting a card prematurely. The ‘wrath’ of the group fell upon them. Do not break the group rules in Africa! We joked about a suitable bear for the perpetrator and the ice broke.

 

They began interpreting the feelings attached to the cards for each other and reserving particular ones for themselves. It was as if the cards gave them permission and a focus to talk about their feelings with each other. I was watching this and wondered what an on-looker would think of the animation, laughter and bubbling conversation around a table with a few bear cards.

 

During the couples conversations one man began to offer his wife of over twenty years a verbal bridge into his world. The protective walls of rigidity, sternness and control were slowly, haltingly breached. He invited his wife into the vulnerable areas of his inner world. He stumbled to grasp at words that would convey the impotence he felt when he came home with little and was confronted with her list of legitimate needs.

 

She was stunned by his unaccustomed honesty and candour. Her heart responded and she voiced her longing to be involved in his world; to bring to him her gifts of diligence, hard work, resourcefulness—not in a demanding way, but as an offering to him. She wanted to be seen by him as someone of worth and value, as someone to love and include in their fragile existence together. The conversation had started with brittleness but as the words were found, a listening was made. The look in their eyes said it all. For perhaps the first time in their relationship they had truly heard each other. They had given themselves a precious gift—the gift of listening and intimacy.

 

 

The Bears Attend a Conference

From Jacinta Lithgow, Executive Officer, Good Shepard Social Justice, Melbourne.

 

During 1999 The Bears had the privilege of attending the Australian Forum for Social Justice Conference.

 

Jacinta Lithgow took The Bears to a conference entitled 'Imagine That: Living Justly Through Memory, Story and Imagination: An invitation to explore a new perspective.'

 

Participants were introduced to The Bears on the Friday night and were invited to choose a Bear that they came with, but which they wanted to leave aside for the weekend. Once chosen, these Bears were put outside the circle.

 

People then chose a Bear that they wanted to discover or be for the weekend. These Bears were brought into the circle and for the rest of the weekend everyone wore the sticker for their Bear. Any newcomers went through the same process as well. On the Sunday morning everyone became their Bear for a group photo!

 

Jacinta said 'I also took along the Strength Cards. I wasn't sure why-just in case. We used them after a story telling session about East Timor. This had been pretty heavy and we needed to move on to something more hopeful. The Strength Cards were introduced as The Bears' friends. They were passed around the group-the cards 'choosing' a person randomly. When they were all handed out, we began a spiral-a spiral of strength. People came forward, named their strength and placed it in the spiral. There was lots of laughter and we built a really nice place to move on from.'

 

 

The Bears as Story Book Illustrations

 

Debra Kitic works with the Department of Education, Training, Community and Cultural Development in Wynyard, Tasmania. She sent us a story written by a grade 2 child with whom she was working. 'Stacey' had had a difficult time during the illness and hospitalisation of a younger sibling. She was normally a bouncy articulate little girl who had little trouble expressing her feelings and who loved to write stories.

 

Debra decided to use The Bears with her and found them really useful in enabling 'Stacey' to talk about her feelings about her sibling's illness. She and Debra wrote the story together and 'Stacey' chose a Bear to illustrate each page. She also shared her story with her class which brought an added dimension to the experience. Debra said 'I find The Bears help younger kids talk about difficult things in a fun way. I would normally use them with less articulate kids so it was great to find that 'Stacey' enjoyed using them too.

(Names and details have been changed to maintain confidentiality.)

Bears in Bucharest

By Nicky Partridge

 

At a meeting of the Australian Breastfeeding Association (formerly The Nursing Mothers Association) six years ago, Nicky Partridge was introduced to some cuddly little characters. No, not the bunch of bouncing babies that were also present for the meeting, but The Bear cards-just as cute, almost as cuddly but decidedly more hairy.

 

The facilitator spread all the cards out and asked the mothers to select three that expressed how they were feeling now, and three that showed what they would like to be feeling more of in future. It was a case of love at first sight for Nicky; she fell for The Bears straightaway and since this simple lounge-room introduction they have become her globe-trotting companions. They recently travelled with her to Bucharest in Romania.

 

In August 1997 Nicky established her hospitality consulting business called 'Jigsaw Corporate Training' and now offers human resources training to clients ranging from the humble pub to international hotel chains.

 

The Romanian connection

So how did the Romanian connection arise? 'A former colleague of mine, Paul Hutton, is the general manager at the Athenée Palace Hilton in Bucharest. He invited me to write and run two supervisory workshops entitled Self-Powered Supervision.

 

'The workshops were built around three broad areas: self-motivation, self-management and self-expression. A total of 45 people attended the training in two groups. All of them were Romanians who spoke English with differing degrees of competency.'

 

Ice-breaker exercise

Nicky used the Strength Cards early in the training as a way for people to introduce themselves and their goals. She asked the participants to select three strengths they felt they currently had and three they would like more of. Interestingly, many people found it easier to identify the strengths they wanted to develop rather than those they already had. In the discussion that followed she highlighted the importance of acknowledging our existing strengths and those of others.

 

Closure exercise

'I used The Bears at the end of the trainings as a way of encouraging people to express how they were feeling,' Nicky said. 'I placed all the cards in a circle on the floor and we all stood around the edge. I asked everyone to select a card that represented how they were feeling. I find that mostly there are enough bears showing similar feelings for people to be able to have a card each. Actually, there was one person left at the end whose preferred card had been selected by someone else and she chose a grumpy bear to tell everyone about the card she really wanted!

 

'Then each person introduced their bear and escribed how they felt. Words like happy, joyful and excited were used and also overwhelmed, tired, and sad that the training was coming to an end.

 

Standing behind a bear

'I really love The Bears. This is the best way to have closure!' Nicky said. 'There are so many reasons for this, I think. Firstly, the Bears have no words-this was great for the language barrier. Also using the Bears is such a non-threatening way to express feelings. People are exposing their feelings but they are doing it standing behind a bear.

 

The bear characters are so light-hearted and fun. They are also a relatively quick way to get people talking about and reflecting upon feelings. Also, I really like how physical using them can be-activities that involve standing and moving around can be created with the cards.'

 

Pre-opening emotions

'Recently I did some training with the staff from the Hotel Lindrum, a 56 room boutique hotel in Melbourne. It was just two days before the hotel was due to open and I asked the staff to choose a bear card that expressed how they were each feeling. Emotions such as elated, scared, nervous, excited, and happy were expressed via the bear characters. It was such a great session-everyone was able to relax and see that it was ok to feel whatever they were feeling and that others felt that way also.

 

 

 

The Bears go to University

 

The Bears were discovered playing on the page of the University's of Queensland's prospectus for students of Social and Behavioural Sciences. We asked Catherine Young, Marketing and Communications Office for the Department, how they came to be there. This is the background information that Catherine generously offered us.

 

'The Bears cards are used within seminars where social work students are learning the skills of counselling and group work. In this particular exercise, they were being used to introduce the concept of reflection of feelings, because they each represent a feeling and the mages assist students to find a richer vocabulary to accurately identify various feelings in people.

 

I have also used The Bears to help students who are role-playing a client to tell their 'story' by choosing a card to represent their feelings at different times in the life event. Having resources like The Bears provides variety in teaching, and gives students ideas for their later work. Several students have borrowed my set to use in group activities on field placement.'

 

The Bears in Africa

By Caterina Mezzatesta

 

After a long standing obsession with Africa, the opportunity finally came to do some volunteer teaching in Arusha, Tanzania at Edmund Rice Sinon Secondary School and the local Primary School & Kindergarten.

 

I came equipped with all my favourite resources, The Bears, Strength Cards for Kids, Inside Out, Angels with Attitude, Sometimes Magic and The Wrong Stone. I first brought The Bears into the classroom of the Special Form One Program (a single term taught exclusively by volunteers to help students improve their English), asking students to choose the Bear that represents them now and to choose the Bear that represents how they feel about school.

 

Some interesting responses came back. Lots were tired but happy 'now', and some were confused and angry about the bullying they encountered at school. Some were nervous and scared about what lay ahead and others very happy to have made new friends and be part of such a good environment.

 

Another day, I put them into smaller groups of 4 or 5. I Gave them two bears and the following instructions:

 

• Give your Bears a name
• Describe how they are feeling
• Explain why they are feeling that way
• Create a conversation between the Bears

 

Interestingly, but hardly surprisingly, most sad or angry Bears were sad or angry because they were either hungry or failed their examinations. Likewise, if a Bear was happy or excited it was because his stomach was full or he passed his national exam.

 

Here in Tanzania 1,200 students sat the entrance exam to get into Edmund Rice, with only 200 places available. Only 20% of students will attend high school. When the time comes, should they fail the national exam, there is no second chance - no repeating the year. That is the end of their schooling. So it's no wonder so much anxiety surrounds 'the exam'.

 

Only the very dedicated and very lucky will make it all the way through to form six and on to University. I hope these kids with whom I am privileged to work, will see their dreams come true and live their aspirations of being doctors and lawyers, pilots, teachers and much more.

www.edmundrice.habari.co.tz

 

The Bears in Action

By Janice Brawn, integration Aide, Lucknow Primary School, Bairnsdale.

 

'The classroom teacher of Prep and Grade 1 & 2 asked me to take the children in groups of four and do an activity with them so that I could pick up on any speech problems.

 

I used The Bears cards, scuffling these on the floor and asking each child to choose three. We looked at them one by one and decided what the bear was feeling and saying. I would look at that bear and say what I was feeling and each child would follow what I'd said. This way I was able to pick up on any speech problems, other than just pronunciation or grammar that was developing.

 

I was amazed that this pack of Bears brought out such animation in these youngsters, some of whom, three days into their very first days of school were not saying much at all. The children imitated these bears beautifully in their facial expressions, their hand and body gestures and their speech. It was also very interesting watching what cards each child chose and for what reason. The happy little girls chose happy bears with smiles on their faces and cards that were bright yellow, etc.

 

One little boy who gave the impression that he didn't really want to be a part of the activity, chose two bears that had their backs turned. I made the suggestion that maybe these bears were a bit rude for not paying attention. His interpretation was that the bears were in fact shy. When I looked at his reasoning's, I realised that he had perhaps chosen himself in these cards. He was in fact shy and not sure of himself and his environment. Even so, he was able to express his feelings via the bears.

 

What an incredible tool to be able to use in activities and to also help to read and understand the young children in today's busy and sometimes confusing world. Each child was rewarded with a Strength Cards for Kids sticker, and the promise of more activities with the I Can Monster cards that I have ordered.'

 

 

Doing H.O.P.E.

 

Joe Fleming is a social worker in practice in Western Australia. We received a cryptic email from him late last century in which he thanked us for The Bears saying he had used them successfully in family work but giving no further details. Your intrepid editor ever on the look out for good copy immediately emailed him for more details and the following story of doing H.O.P.E. duly arrived.

 

Joe used The Bears with a mother and her 4 daughters. The girls aged 3, 8, 11, and 13 had had extensive involvement with Family Services and had been removed from home for protective reasons. The 8-ear-old in particular had been the subject of neglect and abuse. After some time, three of the children were returned home and Joe was asked to assess the appropriateness of returning the 8-year-old to mother's care.

 

'One of the issues was that no matter how well we could put pen to paper regarding a genogram, the mother was unable to explore her family of origin with me. Even talking about her own mother and father was very difficult and often raised her own feelings of being abandoned and neglected. It was clear that some part of her parenting of her four children was related to her own childhood. However, the main issue was how to tap into this in a respectful and sensitive way to "help other possibilities emerge".'

 

'One of the strengths of this mother was that, even when all the children were removed, she found the inner and outer resources to paint and wall-paper the house including the children's bedrooms.'

 

This gave Joe an idea and the next day he took The Bears out to the mother's home. He introduced The Bears family as a way of looking at the woman's family as she saw it rather than trying to gather information for a genogram which was an unfamiliar concept.

 

'As soon as she saw The Bears, her eyes lit up and she began to laugh. She seemed to feel at ease with them and was prepared to give them a go.'

 

'We spent four sessions together placing The Bears on the kitchen table. In some ways this did not seem real yet she was able to describe her family of origin as if she was telling a children's story-incredible. It felt neither threatening nor disrespectful and was at times very powerful. The mother could see some similarities with her own parenting and also some comforting differences. What was important was that this was the beginning and that the journey once started could now not be stopped.'

 

'I gave the mother a copy of The Bears so that she could keep them as a sort of photo album. The 8-year-old was returned to mother's care about three months later and is still at home. The mother wrote to me some weeks later to say thank you, acknowledging that she has a long way to go, but that the journey is made easier knowing that there are people to help and to listen to her.'

 

 

 

The Bears in Family Sculpting

By Tricia Steele, Social Worker, Inglewood & District Health Service

 

'Ally' was a 6-year-old girl who was struggling to make sense of her family situation. She was living with relatives because of issues of physical and emotional abuse within her own family. The counsellor found that 'Ally' could talk about the abuse but had difficulty talking of her feelings about being separated from her mother and siblings. It seemed from her behaviour that she was experiencing some confusion and sadness.

 

The counsellor spread The Bears on the floor and invited 'Ally' to choose a card for everyone in the family. She chose a sad and frightened Bear for her mum and sad Bears for her siblings. Her carers were represented by 'comfy, huggy' Bears. Dad was an angry Bear and was placed apart from the other Bears. 'Ally' said she did not want him close by as he 'hurts us all the time'. When invited to choose a Bear for how she would like the family to be, 'Ally' chose happy Bears and talked about the family being united again. She said she wanted to be with her mum and siblings and live close to her relatives. Dad was still represented by an angry Bear and 'Ally' said 'We don't want him near us. We can be happy without him'.

 

  

Child Trauma Counselling in Indonesia

By Karen Flanagan, National Program Manager, Child Wise

 

Child Wise is a part of a global network working to prevent the sexual abuse and exploitation of children in Australia and overseas. They run programs in South East Asia, the Asia pacific region as well as Australia. If you would like to know more about the work of Child Wise please visit their website www.childwise.net

 

In November 2005, Karen Flanagan (who works for Child Wise, a not-for-profit child protection organisation based in Melbourne ) provided training to 80 people from all over Indonesia.

 

One workshop was supported by World Vision and held in Jakarta and the second was held in Medan, Northern Sumatra, and coordinated by PKPA, a child advocacy and research, not-for-profit organisation.

 

The purpose of both workshops was to equip participants with basic counselling skills to address the trauma, grief, and loss they have experienced since the Boxing Day (2004) tsunami. Unfortunately, as a result of the displacement and the loss of parents, significant adults and caregivers, some children in the region are vulnerable to commercial sexual exploitation and hijacking. It is the mission of Child Wise to prevent the sexual abuse and exploitation of children in Australia and overseas.

 

Thanks to funding from the Victorian Government for the workshop in Medan and the Body Shop for the workshop in Jakarta, six days of training were provided to 80 workers and volunteers ranging from police, teachers, medical and childcare staff, social welfare workers, social policy personnel from government and non-government organisations.

 

The training aimed to strengthen child protection strategies in the region. Several participants came from Banda Aceh and Nias, and were directly affected by the tsunami. It also provided participants with knowledge on the following:

 

• The convention on the rights of the child and Indonesian law

• Children's physical emotional, sexual and development needs

• The different forms of child abuse and psychological impacts

• Definitions and impacts of natural disaster trauma

• Theories and practical application of child counselling frameworks

• The ways sex offenders operate

• Commercial sexual exploitation prevention strategies.

 

Key messages of the training included the empowerment of children and their rights to protection using personal safety and psycho-social recovery program strategies. The workers were also taught skills to protect themselves from burnout and vicarious trauma.

 

There were many highlights from both workshops, one being the absolute pleasure and fun evoked by the use of the St Luke's Bears cards and the Koala Company faces, as you will see from the photographs. We use The Bears cards a lot in our overseas training as they have no words on them so no translation is necessary. The language of feelings is universal and The Bear cards never fail to lift a workshop, inspiring people to describe their own feelings or giving them creative ways to encourage children to express their feelings, especially in regard to grief or loss.

 

The Koala faces were used as an introductory warm up. They are a very effective ice-breaker for the first day of a workshop where language is a barrier between trainer and participants and participants are anxious about participating and sharing.

 

The stickers were also used to liven up sessions in the afternoon, assist group discussions or for little rewards for small group activities and creative ideas. The beauty of the cards and stickers is that you can make up ideas for their use as you go along. I would never travel without them! We will have to work out some ways to get other cards translated (e.g. Strength Cards) as I really miss using them when English is not spoken by participants. [Strengths Cards are currently available in Japanese and Swedish-ed.]

 

The experience of working with these people was incredibly humbling and the resilience and positive attitudes displayed in the face of so much adversity were remarkable. One of the most emotional moments came when I met 14 children who were orphaned as a result of the tsunami and are now living in a children's home in Medan, funded by a German charity. Feedback and many emails received since my return indicate a strong desire for more training of this nature in the region. We will endeavour to identify future funding to continue this much needed capacity building work.

 

The Bears-Feelings for all Seasons

 

The Bears (originally The Bear Family) started life as a family sculpture tool. Family sculpturing is a well-known family therapy technique that creates a family tree (or a genogram) using images or icons to represent family members. These representative images are then moved to indicate the strength of particular relationships.

 

At the time, we thought that using a set of bear characters to work in this way was pretty clever. Little did we realise the cleverness of countless workers who discovered The Bears and invented their own ways of using them.

 

First published in 1995 The Bears have had numerous reprints and several 'renovations', but essentially they are the same band of 48 characters that have produced so many creative conversation-building ideas. The secrets to the success of The Bears are pretty obvious. Bears are of course an iconic animal, virtually universally loved (although at the time we designed the cards we thought they were just cute). Affection for bears crosses most cultural boundaries which together with the absence of any words meant that they spoke a universal language.

 

Further, The Bears seemed to work for all ages-well maybe not easily with teenage boys! At the same time they have been used with success in situations we would never have imagined. I can still vividly recall a Maori Elder talking about his work in New Zealand prisons with hardened gang leaders with the full facial tattoos. He vividly described the tears running down the cheeks of these men because The Bears has got them in touch with feelings they hadn't expressed for years. Amazing!

 

It is the simplicity of The Bears that have made them our most versatile tool and even though in recent years we have published other tools that describe feelings (Stones...Have Feelings Too! and Koala Company) The Bears retain an enormous popularity.

 

 

 

THE FEELINGS CHECK

 

The Bears provide a succinct way of summarising how we are feeling. They offer a quick and effective way of describing our feelings at any stage of a conversation. Often we will ask, 'How are you feeling?' to get a snapshot of the experience of those we are talking with. The Bears can provide an instant 'feelings check' by helping to get this snapshot into focus.

 

At the start of conversations we sometimes use feelings checks as 'ice-breakers', which is not a term I prefer because it has connotations of being like a party game or at least an activity that is outside the real purpose and work of the conversation. However, if we reframe 'ice-breaker' to mean the way we invite our clients/students/colleagues, etc to engage with us, we can highlight the vital nature of the early stages of conversation-building.

 

At the beginning of many conversations we use a whole variety of ways to determine the emotional states of those we are talking with. We might use small talk or a direct question, a ritual or an activity as we work out the most appropriate way of inviting engagement and participation in the conversation.

 

The Bears provides an alternative way of conducting a feelings check early in a conversation. You can spread the cards and ask:

• How are you travelling today?

• Which bear/s sums up your feelings at present?

• Which bear is you right now?

 

This activity might be quick and light-hearted but if there are significant issues the conversation can be developed along the lines of 'unpacking the baggage' and 'our relationship with our problems'.

 

At any stage during individual counselling, groupwork or in a meeting you might be curious about how the conversation is being experienced. The Bears can be introduced at any time to provide a quick update on participants' feelings. This can have the effect of reenergising the conversation if it is lagging or perhaps getting it back on track if it is not meeting the needs of participants. It can get the 'unsaids' out on the table enabling the conversation to change direction.

 

As well as a tool for feelings checks The Bears can be used as a novel way of gaining feedback and evaluation:

• Can you find a bear that represents how you feel about what you have just heard?

• Is there a bear that sums up your experience of this event or activity?

• Can you pick the bear that represents your feelings now at the end of our time together?

• Is it a different bear than the one you chose (or would have chosen) at the beginning of our conversations? In what way is the bear different?

 

To build the feedback and evaluation applications of The Bears from a simple feelings check, see the chapter called 'Evaluation with a Difference'.

 

 

UNPACKING THE BAGGAGE

 

Have you ever wondered about the ability of feelings to transfer from one situation to another? Of course we all know people who are brilliant at compartmentalising feelings-containing feelings within the boundaries of a particular event. To some extent this is what all health and human service workers learn in their professional socialisation. It is what enables a paramedic to attend a horrific road accident and then, perhaps within minutes, organise the games at their child's birthday party.

 

But it often doesn't happen as neatly as that, and every experienced worker is aware of times when their normal coping mechanisms or defences don't work and the emotional baggage that they thought they had under control spills out.

 

It is very common for feelings from one event to merge with another. They can't always be kept discrete and it is very common for us to be unaware of a lot of the baggage we carry until some seemingly inconsequential event 'lets the cat out of the bag'.

 

There are lots of situations where it is important to give people the opportunity to unpack their emotional baggage, if they choose to do so. Often at the start of a workshop I use The Bears to help participants identify and describe the baggage they may have brought with them from that morning, the day before, from their weekend or their previous week. If people are going to be asked to reveal themselves to others, no matter how respectfully or gently this is established, it can be important for them to assess the feelings they are carrying.

 

At one workshop when I did this a woman burst into tears immediately because a dear friend of hers had died a couple of days earlier. While this reminder was intensely painful to her, to be able to talk about it and receive support and understanding from her group meant that she was able to stay in the group and deal with it. Otherwise, I think there was every chance she wouldn't have continued for the duration of the workshop.

 

For kids at school, unpacking the baggage from their weekend on a Monday morning can be an important part of dealing with issues before they are acted out in the classroom.

 

At the start of any event like a committee meeting, a group gathering or in a supervision situation, using The Bears to identify participants' feelings about what has happened recently in their lives might take just a few minutes-but it might make the rest of the time together more useful and focused.

 

Spread the cards out.

Can you choose at least one bear (more if you want) that represents your day or your weekend, etc?

 

 

B.W.F.

 

Kevin Fitzgerald is a businessman from Melbourne, Australia. One day, in response to the exasperation he was experiencing while trying to have a dinner table conversation with his children, he invented a simple ritual. Everyone at the table was invited to share three short stories over the meal-the best (B), worst (W) and funniest (F) thing that had happened that day.

 

This incredibly simple ritual so transformed the evening meal with his family that Kevin had the words 'best, worst, funniest' printed on the back of his business cards. Now he enjoys sharing this simple idea with others and sometimes uses the same ritual to begin meetings and open group conversations.

 

The best rituals, like the best meetings, are often the simplest and this one, we know from our own experience, works brilliantly.

 

And you can add to it by using The Bears:

 

Can you choose three bears, each of which represents the best, worst and funniest thing that has happened today or this week, or in whatever time frame you like?

 

Used as visual metaphors in this way, The Bears can help participants remember parts of the story they might otherwise have forgotten and act as reminders for how they were feeling at the time.

 

 

EVALUATION WITH A DIFFERENCE

 

David Pugh, one of the directors of Innovative Resources, was asked several years ago to conduct an evaluation of the Spastic Society of Victoria with clients of the organisation. Running an evaluation group with clients, many of whom were struggling with severe cerebral palsy and who found communication to be a huge challenge, was not easy.

 

Dave devised a series of questions to elicit feedback from the clients using The Bears. Each evaluative question could be responded to by pointing at the bear that best expressed the client's feelings about that part of the service.

 

The activity was very powerful for a group who may often feel overlooked and undervalued. It demonstrated that evaluation can include non-verbal methods which can add extra layers of meaning even when verbal communication is an option:

 

• Which bear sums up your feelings about the.workshop, meeting, conference?

• Which bear was the one you went into the event as?

• Which one did you come out as?

• Which bear represents the highlights and which the lowlights?

 

The Bears can be used very effectively in evaluative discussions. Stickers can be added to the commonly used evaluation forms. Perhaps you could try it to see if any new insights are gained.

 

 

SEQUENCING: THE (BEAR) CHAIN OF REACTIONS

 

Imagine any critical incident. It doesn't have to be a hugely calamitous event; a small, bothersome glitch might do, perhaps an argument over something trivial, a staff meeting where frayed nerves emerge, an unfulfilled promise.

 

Critical reflection provides a range of tools for analyzing and interrogating any event, particularly those that leave us dissatisfied. Such reflection often includes a replay (perhaps in slow motion!) with an array of questions that challenge and extend our view of the incident.

 

One of these tools is 'sequencing' or 'circular questioning' as it is sometimes known. It can be very much like a slow motion replay that relives the situation frame by frame. A series of questions can help rebuild the sequence of events:

 

• What was happening before the incident?
• What happened first?
• Who said what?
• Who did what?
• What do you think they intended?
• What do you think they were feeling?
• What happened next?

 

Such questions can be repeated as the sequence of events is replayed until there is an ending or a logical break in the narrative at which time other questions can be added:

 

• How did feelings change over the course of the incident?

• Were there particular times that were turning points-moments when the incident could have moved in different ways?

• What happened at the end?

• What feelings/thoughts/words/intentions did people leave with?

• In what ways was it resolved?

 

The Bears cards or stickers can be used to identify the participants in the scenario. As the incident unfolds, different cards can be used to identify how the feelings and body language of each participant evolved during the course of the event. In addition, The Bears can demonstrate how one person's feelings can cause others to react. We talk about people 'pushing our buttons'. The Bears can graphically illustrate how this unfolds in critical incidents.

 

BIG EVENTS: LIFE TRANSITIONS

 

Big events in our lives-exams, accidents, illness, leaving home, marriage, divorce, bereavement, giving birth, retirement, etc-are full of complex, often confusing, emotions. These big events in our lives often persist as strong memories and can provoke strong emotions for years after the event, whether they are joyous or traumatic. By representing the mixture of emotions we (or others) may feel, The Bears can provide a powerful tool for reflecting on the significance of these transitional events in our lives:

 

• For example, think about your first day on the job in you current position. Which bears represent the range of feelings you experienced leading up to, and on, the day itself?

• How did your feelings change over the course of the day or even in the first week?

• Which bears represent other people you met on this day?

• Can you use The Bears to tell the story of your first day?

• How did the feelings of other people affect you?

• How did your feelings influence them?

• How did your strengths help you get through?

 

Reflecting on transitional events itself can unleash strong emotions, particularly if coupled with guided imagery and hypnotic techniques. In workshops we sometimes use The Bears in connection with guided imagery to process the experience of leaving home for the first time:

 

'Imagine you are walking towards a large lake with the people you grew up with. You walk out onto a pier that juts out into the lake. At the end of the pier is a boat. You step into the boat knowing that you